Celebrity Obituaries

Review this week's trending celebrity news stories

Grief Recovery Guidance Center logo

John James, founder of The Grief Recovery Institute

John W. James

Founder of The Grief Recovery Institute®
Co-Author of The Grief Recovery
Handbook & When Children Grieve

Russell Friedman, Executive Director of The Grief Recovery Institute

Russell Friedman

Executive Director
Co-Author of The Grief Recovery
Handbook & When Children Grieve


Ask John & Russell

"Grief is not so much a disease to be cured, as it is a natural reaction to loss, and the goal should be reconciliation and completion, not avoidance." (Published 10/16/2012)

Q:

I just want to say thank you.

I found "The Grief Recovery Handbook" very helpful.

After losing my husband to cancer I became very sad and reached out to my healthcare provider for support. They asked if I thought I might be depressed. I said yes, who wouldn't be after losing their life-long partner?.
They setup an appointment for me with a psychiatrist who was anxious to put me on anti-depressants and "treat my illness".
I took them for 6 months but they didn't really help me do anything but sleep so I stopped taking them but, I was feeling worse instead of better.

I called back & requested counseling but was told drugs would be more effective in "curing me".
I more or less gave up on them at that point.

That's when I found your book online and ordered it.
What I found most helpful about the book is that it clarified in writing what I knew to be true in my heart: That grief is not so much a disease to be cured, as it is a natural reaction to loss, and the goal should be reconciliation and completion, not avoidance.

I want to thank you for lessening the guilt and stigma surrounding grief so I could begin to heal in a very real sense, by accepting that my feelings were normal and to be expected.

Everyone seems to just want us to "get over" it.
I think I know by now that one doesn't really "get over" losing a loved one. They just learn to incorporate the loss into their life. Although they are gone, our feelings for them remain and must be sorted. It's more about forming a new relationship with them from afar than it is about forgetting.
One never really forgets.

Your book was a validation of this for me.
It helped me a lot. Thank you :)


« Prev Question Next Question »       View Q&A Archive »

Ask John & Russell Archives



Find Local Support

If you or someone important to you wants help with grief: Look for a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist℠ in your community. The Grief Recovery Institute ® trains and mentors Certified Grief Recovery Specialists℠ throughout the United States & Canada.

See Russell and John's blog at Psychology Today

Workshops & Training Schedule

The Grief Recovery Institute ® offers Certification Training programs for those who wish to help grievers.

    April 2017
    Indianapolis, IN - April 7-10, 2017
    Princeton, NJ - April 7-10, 2017
    Reading, Berkshire, England - April 21-24, '17
    Denver, CO - April 21-24, 2017
    Vancouver, BC, Canada - Apr 28-May 1,'17
    San Francisco, CA - Apr 28-May 1,'17
    May 2017
    Seattle, WA - May 5-8, 2017
    Dallas, TX - May 5-8, 2017
    Milwaukee, WI - May 19-22, 2017
    Torquay, Devon, England - May 19-22, '17
    Regina, SK, Canada - May 19-22,'17
    Los Angeles, CA - May 19-22, 2017

View All Dates »